Bored, lazy and with nothing to look forward to in life, I was crawling for one paycheck to the next almost the entirety of 2018. Basically living in my bed binge watching series on Netflix, scrolling through social media and talking to strangers in dating apps, I was admittedly aimless and going nowhere. Will every day of my life be this uneventful and meaningless? Was adulthood just this dull? Should I just accept this as my life now?
Action was the Keyword
"No" I finally realized after taking some much needed time off from social media and dating apps that most defined how I spent my 2018. Nothing was happening in my life because I wasn't doing anything. I may have all of these hopes and dreams, things I wanted to do, places I wanted to go and goals I wanted to achieve, but I was nowhere near them. We can't just wait for things to happen to us when we're not even trying to give them a shot.
"Action" that was answer. I need to move, to try and just take action. We're not in school anymore for teachers and professors to tell us what to do. We're not getting a grade for our efforts either. You're all on your own. You have to really want something so bad and give your all for something to succeed. I believed in myself enough to know that I can do it. When I was in school, I was very consistent, hard-working and driven. What if I redirected that energy into something I actually care about? I may not be ready, but is it actually possible for me to pursue my passion, to be the person I want to be?
At the start of year, I wrote down my New Year's Resolutions and swore to myself that I would see them through. No more waiting around. No more sulking in silence and placing blame on the past. I am committed to this decision and now is the time take action.
I'm Super Thankful and Proud of 2019's Many Blessings
And now that 2019 is closing in, I can say that I've crossed off everything I wrote down on that list. I finally went to the gym and gotten stronger even when I could barely lift a dumbbell before. I took creative writing classes and courses online and not because someone forced me to. I was honestly surprised how I hungrily took in the knowledge because I knew I needed it. I got to travel to a lot of different places this year and tried a lot of fun stuff. I've stepped out of my introversion from time to time and made a lot of new friends on many occasions. I also got promoted in my desk job even when I wasn't expecting it. I was just proactive in doing the work that I felt needed to be done. It's been amazing and I feel so blessed.
And the thing that I am most proud of this year is the birth of my blog and everything it has allowed me to do. Sewer Rant was just a fun idea I held onto, but never actually thought would happen. At first, I just wanted a space for me to write and be read. I journal daily for sure, but I felt like I needed to write for other people. I'm not a celebrity and don't have much friends, but will other people actually care about what I say?
If You Love What You Do, You'll Work Everyday of Your Life
It was hard at first because I knew nothing about building websites and marketing and promoting your posts. There was so much to learn and so much I just lacked. I stuck through it though. Even when my website was up and running, I had a lot of things I needed to fix and mistakes I needed to do over. It was frustrating, but worth it. I also spent a whole lot of time, money and effort on my blog even when I knew I wasn't going to get anything back. It was okay because I loved it, so much.
And then, we were published in an online magazine, featured in different brands' social media pages and got invited to several media events I'm very proud to support. We also got monetized for Google Adsense which has really been quite a challenge after being rejected a bunch of times. (I can now earn if you click the ads on my website. I don't exactly get any actual money yet until I've reached the $100 cap. But at least, the fact is I can and that's enough to be happy about).
Sewer Rant is Kind of my Heart and Soul
It was also because of Sewer Rant that I was able to come out to my parents which I never though in a million years would happen. Sewer Rant is the story of my life and has genuinely helped me sort out a lot of issues. Writing about my daily struggles mentally and emotionally for you guys is making me become a better person. We can never be perfect people and it's not always easy to try and make the right choices every day. Time is always passing by. We're growing older by the second, many good people has left us and things will never be what they once were.
Change is conflicting and the more I seem to see of the world, the scarier things appear. Yes, writing is a source of comfort, but what we might say now, may be harder to act on when the need arises. Though if we take the time to clear our minds and see things out in the open, we might just find the answers we're looking for. We just have to now convince ourselves to go for it!
Thank You for Spending your 2019 with Sewer Rant!
I am so happy for everyone who took the time to read a post. I hope that in one way or another I was able to help you feel a bit better, even for short while. Thank you so much for the support. Your feedback has been really heart-warming and inspires me to continue even when sometimes it's already hard to be juggling a full-time job and a full-time hobby while trying to carry a whole universe in my head. I'm learning a lot of things and I'm certain that there's just so much more out there to find out. I hope that I can continue to share those with you guys!
Are You Ready to Conquer the New Year with Us?
2019 may have ended, but 2020 is already here. It's a fresh start, a blank page and it's time for you to decide how to you want to write your life. What is your 2020 story going to be? Isn't it already time for you to go after what you want and to be who you want to be? You never really know until you actually try. Just believe in yourself that you can do it and be surprised on the things you're already accomplishing. Don't do things just because other people are doing it.
You have to decide what it is you actually want to do. Don't give up when you barely even started and don't be afraid to go in it alone. You'll meet people who'll be happy to help you along the way. Make a commitment to yourself that you are going to live your best life. You don't have start off your journey already perfect. Just be ready and expect to make a lot of mistakes along the way. It's part of the journey and it's only gonna make you better, stronger for everything that's about to come next.
Get up from that bed. Take action and let's claim your success for the New Year!
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